Anti Climax.

202

It didn’t take long for me to want to be back in England. Don’t get me wrong, I love being home with my family and not having to pay rent or for groceries, but I miss the freedom. I miss being so close to one of my most favourite cities in the entire world. I miss exploring new places either by myself or with other people around me. I miss the friends I made too late to spend more time with. I miss the vivid sunsets outside my window. And I miss speaking the English I was brought up with. I had way too much of a good time on my exchange, and I think it might have spoiled me for living anywhere else, I guess whether that’s true or not will hit me when I go back to Windsor in September. But I should have a better time down there than I did last year because I’ve removed that problem and I’ll be living with a person I actually like and know. But Windsor definitely isn’t London, it’s not even that same as the Windsor it was (probably) named after, it doesn’t even have a freaking castle!

Now I’m back in the middle of nowhere, out in the boondocks where the people thrive on country music and beer, where everyone has to drive everywhere and thinks that small town living is the way to go, but I’ve had a taste of the big city, and I really think that’s the place for me. So yeah, coming back here was hard, but staying here will be even harder.

It’s also that time of year where I need to do adult things like buying a car and new things for school, and thinking of my future, where I’ll be and how much that will cost, and doing all of that without a job ready to step right into to pay for it all. It’s not for a lack of trying though, I am pretty sure I have put a resume in almost every place (hiring or not) in the town I live near, so now it’s a waiting game. At least I still have unedited, unpublished pictures that I can go through and relive. So maybe there is an upside to being back, other than the family factor, I’ve actually got time to go through those pictures. Well when there isn’t a foster baby that’s being a little monkey and running into cupboards.

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Its strange being back, that’s for sure.

Sometimes it feels like an anti climax.

But we’ll see how it goes.

Love,

Jess.

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